russell-brand-web

In America, Russell Brand is probably best known for his role in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall.” And as far as I can tell, that acting job is a pretty fair representation of his character in real life as well. To wit, Russell Brand has a reputation as a bit of a Lothario. As such, it wasn’t hard to find a few dodgy pictures of him on the internet.

The Evidence

Aforementioned dodgy photos (compiled in less than five minutes on Google, so who else knows what is out there?):

Seriously, why do parents allow celebrities near their kids?

In case pictures aren’t enough to make you render a snap decision as to Hip vs. Ped, allow me to impart a semi-relevant anecdote.

My co-writer once spent an inordinate amount of time convincing me to watch “Never Mind the Buzzcocks” which is a British music quiz show. Russell Brand was once on the show but it never aired because of some scandal which may or may not have involved kids.* I can’t really say for sure.** But he did appear on The Big Fat Quiz of the Year show twice with his friend Noel Fielding (who is another NMtB star) who wore a cape. This inevitably led to a discussion on the fashion habits of rapists (circa 2:44).

Partners in Crime***

Russell Brand & Noel Fielding - Partners in Crime! (being Goth Detectives is now a crime)

However, misleading evidence aside, Russell Brand is CLEARLY a hipster.

downloads_russell_brand_10

Scruffy? Yes

Crazy ironic hair? Yes

Skinny jeans? Yes (Called drainpipes in the UK, I think)

Accessorizes with scarves, jewelery, etc? Yep

Pasty skin? Yes

Dresses like he could shop exclusively at American Apparel? Yes

Edgy humor? Check (not pictured, see this clip)

Known associates? All hipsters.

Plus, I’d argue that his involvement in “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” would automatically qualify him as a hipster given the creative minds behind the film. Also in the film he plays a rock star which is a pretty hipster thing to do.

Furthermore, Russell has clearly stated that he is attracted to women “between the age of 18 and death” and is unwilling to budge on the issue. He went on to explain that he will never be convinced to take up with a corpse but I suspect that the implied “unwilling to go below the age of 18” is also true.

So, in conclusion, Russell Brand is clearly a threat. Because hipsters are maybe the biggest threat of all to our American way of life. But unless you are a consenting adult you probably need not worry.

*No kids were involved. Per Wikipedia, “Due to the scandal where Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand made lewd phonecalls to Andrew Sachs on Russell’s BBC Radio 2 show, the BBC decided to suspend the two comedians and pull all their shows pending further investigation. Even though this episode of Buzzcocks was taped before the suspension, this episode due to air on 30 October was pulled as well.”

**I’m pretty sure.

Advertisements