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It’s no secret that Dov Charney is a filthy disgusting old man. I wasn’t too surprised to see these ads nasting all over the place on Sorry Mom.

And yet, if it was actually JD Samson instead of just some femmey lookalike, I would be so much less creeped out.

There’s this whole idea that women can’t be pedophiles. Not only have I seen enough SVU episodes and Lifetime movies to know that women can totally be pedophiles, just a different kind of pedophile (it’s harder to catch them because no one expects it!), that is straight up sexist! Just look at Scarlett Johanssen here.

If a man was wearing that outfit, the neighborhood watch would be trailing him like a Saint Bernard looking for someone in an avalanche! Okay, I had to work hard for that so don’t make fun. But seriously. The American Apparel low V neck t shirt? The hat? The sunglasses so no one can see where (or at whom) she’s looking? The cut offs? I love my cut offs and all, but these are ca-razy! Take away her boobs and you have a total pedo!

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