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I’m a temp, too, so I totally understand the need to have an emotional outlet for the emotions that motion through me all the time, mostly about how I hate temping and I wish I had a real job and maybe I should be looking for one then? But at least I OWN my emotions instead of pretending to embrace irony with my Rivers Cuomo glasses and gigantic ugly watch (my watch is kind of big, but it is awesome).

And yes, I am, in fact, aware that I have previously featured a still from this video. But in the words of Goddess Ke$ha Herself, “I don’t give a, I don’t give a, I don’t give a.” Also, it took YEARS but I finally figured out how to add Hulu videos to WordPress, so expect about a million videos of NBC’s Thursday night shows.

SPOILER ALERT: This is a joke. Please don’t get butthurt because your dream boyfriend might be a hipster (and if your dream boyfriend is Noel Fielding, is definitely a hipster).

Some people never have a chance, really. They say that pedophilia is a vicious cycle and I can only assume that time will show that hipster parents beget hipster kids as well. It is clearly too late for our lost boy Noel Fielding but I hold out hope that his brother Michael Fielding can still be saved. But we must act quickly!

Unhand That Child, Sir!

I suspect that Noel Fielding will try to thwart us so first we need to ascertain what sort of  a threat he poses! Thus I ask you, dear readers, Noel Fielding – HIP or PED…make your choice…

p.s. Noel Fielding may have Michael dressing like him (skinny jeans and a skeleton jumper) to make him look older but that fake mustache is fooling no one. The boy is clearly underage.*

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While most people of late had been watching the Olympics with rapt attention I spent the majority of February getting into Criminal Minds. It’s a lot like Law and Order without that L&O twist! at the end. It does, however, have the always-adorable Matthew Grey Gubler. To be honest, he’s like 90% of the reason I watch (I’m shallow-whatever).

The more I see of him, however, the more concerned I become. And thus I turn to you, dear readers to help me decide: Hip or Ped?

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Hey, remember that time I said BJ Novak looked like a pedophile?

It’s like he saw that and now he’s just fucking with me. He looks like the kind of guy I would see on the train on the way home from work, and I would be like “oh, he’s kind of cute I guess,” and then I would realize, no. I’m pretty sure this is what a Juggalo would dress like at a hipster party.

I feel like Mindy Kaling just caught B.J. Novak staring inappropriately at her 9 year-old sister and is like, “Ryan, come on. We’re going home and we’re going to talk about this,” but really she means yell at him for being a pervert.